<<
>You know you're
a Railfan When...
>
>1. You shop for
a house next to the tracks instead of away from them!
>
>2. When planning
your next vacation, you choose your travel route based
upon
>the location of
active railroads and railroad museums.
>
>3. When you blow
your truck's horn two longs, a short, and a long through
>every
intersection.
>
>4. Speaking of
intersections, you call the signals as you go through them.
>
>5. You call your
local zoning commission to ask if you can use a boxcar for
>a shed.
>
>6. You wonder
why automobiles don't come equipped with couplers.
>
>7. While engaged
in intimate relations, you suddenly find yourself mentally
>debating the
relative merits of Genesis vs. F40s.
>
>8. Your wife
tells you her water burst, and your first reaction is, "My
God,
>her boiler will
be ruined!"
>
>9. When you end
every phone conversation with "Roger"
>
>10. When being
served dinner, you say, "Easy, easy, that'll do!" as you've
>gotten enough.
>
>11. When riding
with someone who's backing into a parking space, you say,
>"two cars
-- one car -- far enough."
>
>12. When you get
a shopping cart with a bad wheel, you tag it and set it
>aside for the
shops to repair, or park it in an aisle and put up a blue
flag
>in front of and
behind it.
>
>13. You curse
the dispatcher when you're held up in traffic.
>
>14. While
driving your car, you put your arm on the windowsill and wave
your
>hand and blow
your horn to all kids standing on the street.
>
>15. Your wife
opens her wallet to show the relatives photos of the children
>while you open
your wallet to show them your latest rail photos from last
>weeks fan trip.
>
>16. You install
a pedal operated bell in your car and ring it while driving
>across railroad
crossings.
>
>17. You open
your refrigerator door only to find it full of film for the
>next fan trip.
>
>18. You find
yourself looking for old locomotives and color schemes during
>the obligatory
chase scene through the rail yards when you're watching old
>cop shows and
movies on TV.
>
>19. The efforts
of Hollywood to re-create an earlier era using trains is
met
>with your
derisive snort, "They didn't have GP40-2s in 1970! Can't they get
>it right?"
>
>20. You're on
Amtrak, you find out that the guy across the aisle is a
>Railfan, and
your wives look at each other, roll their eyes and sigh.
>
> >21. You're
in your car and you come up to a railroad crossing. The
crossing
>lights are not
flashing and no trains are coming, but you slow to a crawl
>and look up the
track both ways in hope of seeing a train.
>
>22. You are on a
rail facility tour and start talking to one of the
>mechanics on the
shop floor only to find out that you know more than he
>does.
>
>23. You rent
certain movies at the video store because you know there is a
>very cool train
scene in it.
>
>24. You refuse
to cross the tracks until your favorite train has passed by.
>
>25. You barbecue
using tie butts -- for that special flavor!
>
>26. You tell
your wife you're going down to the corner bar to have a few
>drinks with the
guys, however, you go to your favorite train watching spot
>to take a few
photos.
>
>27. You are on a
highway overpass at 60 mph and you suddenly shout, "That's
>the Seaboard
down there!" and you can't believe the others in the car
didn't
>recognize it by
the color of the ballast.
>
>28. You tell
your wife you would like to take a nice ride to look at
scenery
>and she asks,
"Should I bring something to read while you look at the
>'scenery' in the
rail yard?"
>
>29. You can't
understand why everyone else doesn't understand what
"approach
>diverging"
means.
>
>30. It would not
be to your advantage for the railroad police to come to
>your house and
look around.
>
>31. You get
tired of explaining to people that just because you have a
>scanner you are
not a fireman.
>
>32. Your
relatives think of you when they see a train.
>
>33. You get
irritated whenever a train wrecks because non-railfans "invade"
>your special
train watching spots.
>
>34. The train
crews know you by first name or you know them by first name.
>
>35. When all
your friends rely on you to tell them when the morning train
>comes through --
so they can avoid it!
>
>36. You stop at
all railroad crossings and pray for the gates to come down.
>
>37. You are
happy to be at a grade crossing when a long freight passing,
>while those
around you fume.
>
>38. You see a
headlight approaching at a grade crossing, and you slow down
>when everyone is
speeding up.
>
>39. You take
your date to a railroad yard, just to check on what's
>happening.
>
>40. You're
watching a movie and you say, "New York? How can they be in New
>York when
there's a UP freight going by?"
>
>41. You show up
trackside to film the fantrip passing through and you have
>so much camera
equipment that the locals ask you which TV station you're
>with.
>
>42. You're
reading a book about "choo-choos" to your kid and you stop to
>explain that
they've got the side rods drawn all wrong.
>
>43. You can find
the rail yard in a strange city within 5 minutes or less
of
>leaving the
Interstate.
>
>44. You find
yourself telling the scanner what it is going to say next.
>
>45.
"TRAINS" and "PLAYBOY" arrive in the mail the same day and
you open
>"TRAINS" first.
>
>46. You're
driving near some tracks with your non-railfan buddies and you
>see a train and
shout, "A matched set of SD45s!"
>
>47. You go to
your closet and there is no room for clothes because of all
>the slide files
and model railroad boxes.
>
> >48. You
love to eat microwave dinners because they remind you of the
meals
>you had on your
recent Amtrak ride.
>
>49. You work for
the railroad, try to act cool and ignore it all while at
>work. Then, when
you get home, watch how your blood pressure rises to
>extremely high
levels as you relive it in all it's glory to anybody who
will
>listen.
>
>50. Your
doorbell sounds like a steam engine whistle when someone pushes
the
>button.
>
>And Finally You
Definitely Know You Are an Honest to God True Railfan
>When...
>
>You're reading
this list and not only understand every word of it, you have
>said "Hey that's me!" more times than you'd like to admit! >>